Love And Death

Thick eyeliner to hide my eyes
so that no one can see
the tears I cry.
A broken heart and endless pain...
Walking to your house in the rain.
I knock on the door,
but no one is home.
I knew you would
leave me all alone.
I remember your smile,
once so bright...
Now the very thought of you
fills me with fright.
What use to be friendship
turned to love...
But then it turned
to war and blood.
Brown eyes that use to sparkle
seem dark and dull,
as if made of charcoal.
Now there is a knife in my back,
and a hole in my heart,
and blood on the wall
like Gothic art.
Old pictures of happy couples
now just seem like thought bubbles.
I lay here in my casket.
I've died of a broken heart.
Once strong love has fallen apart.
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02 13 2012.
Emotional and nice, well done
Emotional and nice, well done keep it up...
02 17 2012.
I think there is a lot of
I think there is a lot of passion behind this poem but I think its written with simplicity. I think you chose words that rhymed rather than words that truly described. The message has potential, i think you just need to work on a more creative delivery. :)
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